Do You Wait for Feedback or Do You Demand Feedback?


Do You Wait for Feedback or Do You Demand Feedback?

Trigger Question #62

Whenever I read about voting taking place somewhere on our planet, I think about the people who want feedback, those who fear feedback, and those who believe they can ignore feedback. Can you guess who they are? Employees; politicians; bosses.

Let me explain this in reverse order. Any boss can easily ignore feedback until that boss’s boss gets annoyed. (Sometimes the boss’s boss is a shareholder. But that’s better than nothing. I think.)

Next, politicians. Why do politicians fear feedback? Because the feedback they get is in the form of votes. Like-votes or dislike-votes. Nothing in between. By the time the vote counters have totalled the likes and dislikes, it is too late for a politician to influence the dislikes against their name. Too many dislikes means the politician must look for other employment. (Believe it or not, that is how democracy once worked.)

How do politicians overcome their fear of feedback? Put obstacles in the way of voters. Make it difficult for voters to express their dislike. All likes are obviously welcome. And counted.

Now let’s consider employees, the only ones who really want feedback. But first we must discuss the flip side of boss. The manager. (Or leader, if you are so inclined.)

An important part of your role as a manager is to give feedback. How else will people know that they are on the right track? And an important part of your role as manager is… to ask for feedback! How else will you know you are on the right track?

Say what? Ask for feedback? You, the manager? Why should you ask for feedback? Well, has any employee given you unsolicited feedback? Honest-to-goodness constructive feedback? Willingly? I didn’t think so.

The higher up the ladder you are, the less direct feedback you will get. And your back will get more indirect gripes. So turn around, face the gripers and non-gripers, and ask.

Here’s a way to make your ask more effective. Don’t make the people you ask uncomfortable by posing direct questions. Questions such as “How am I doing?” It is much better to invite people to influence your performance by asking questions like this one: “How can we be better at this?”

Did you notice I said “we” and not “I”?

Because the “I” (meaning you) carries a lot of weight. The sort of weight that tips the scales of feedback. It’s amazing how your power to influence employee salaries and bonuses negates their willingness to give you honest, constructive feedback.

But there is power in “we.” Your use of “we” places them inside the circle of feedback, where they must consider their own impact on your performance. (Your use of “we” might even seduce them into saying something nice about you. It will still be indirect, but hey, take what you can get.)

Now that we have covered bosses, politicians, and managers, let’s talk about employees. What if you are not a boss, a manager, not even a leader, but just an employee? Should you bother asking for feedback? Yes, but only if you need the job or want a career. If you do, then take ownership. Own your job and your career. (If they are not yours, whose are they?)

If you are an employee, never wait for feedback. But don’t just ask for feedback. Demand feedback. Every week. Especially from your boss.

(Here’s a little secret. If you are a boss, a manager or a leader, you are still an employee. So ask for feedback.)

Welcome to my side of the nonsense divide.

. . .

Quote of the Moment:

“Never ask for feedback if your back cannot carry it.” The Chief Nonsense Officer.

. . .

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